It was a Monday just like any other Monday. I was running around the house looking for my cel phone, my keys, matching mittens for the kids and yelling at them to turn the T.V off because we were going to be late. On this particular Monday Mr. Liberty Dee had left the house a bit earlier than usual and I was feeling the angst of a
usual unorganized Monday morning.
I finally asked my boys to go on ahead and get in the car while a corralled baby girl into her coat. The boys went out and within a minute were back in. The Plan simply said ” We have a problem”. Then he continued ” There’s a dead Bunny on the drive way”
Ever since we moved into this neighbourhood over a year ago I have been in awe of the amount of rabbits in the area. I am not well versed in all things rabbit so I don’t know what kind of rabbits they are. All I know is that they hop, wiggle their nose, have longs ears and are just so darn cute. I see a at least one or two a day and I just love them and so does Baby Girl. So when I heard The Plan state there was a dead bunny on the drive way my mind automatically went to how I was going to protect my baby girl from the trauma of seeing a dead bunny.
I then proceeded to ask a slew of stupid questions like:
- What do you mean a dead bunny?
- Like dead dead?
- Are you sure its dead?
- Where is it dead?
As I write this I have realized that there was probably a very simple solution to the problem I was faced with. I am now thinking I should have left the kids in the house, gone out to find the bunny and removed the body. However hind sight is 20 / 20 because that is not at all what I did.
What I did do is come up with plan. I would hold Baby Girls hand and keep her close to me. I would shuffle along side ways to shield her from seeing the dead bunny, I would quickly get her in the car and quickly drive away before she saw anything. At the time it seemed like a logical plan, I realize now that I was under the influence of Monday morning, I am late, I should not have stayed up watching Netflix.
I set out the front door with baby Girl in hand and as soon as I could see the drive way, I saw the bunny. Well, not the whole bunny it looked more like an episode of Bugs Bunny when he pretends to die and stiffens his legs up in the air because that is all I could see in the snow., Two bunny feet up in the air. I turned sideways and began to shuffle along talking to Baby Girl trying to keep her busy. I made it to the car and as I was putting her in she caught a glimpse of the bunny with her peripheral vision. “Look Mommy, its a bunny” ” Yeah sweetie it’s a bunny, we are late get in the car” I repositioned myself so that I would block her view. As I started to put her buckle on she turned her head toward the bunny and waved ” Bye, Bye Bunny”.
I finished bucking her in and slid the door closed. I turned and finally got a good look at the bunny on the driveway. The poor thing had been run over. Mr.Liberty Dee had obviously been the cause of death as I could quite literally see the tire track where the bunny’s head had once been. Usually the sight of this would have brought me to tears but as you moms know ,having kids gives us the ability to “suck it up” and act in the kids best interests (Or what we think is their best interest) In that moment I realized that I couldn’t simply drive away and leave the bunny there. Our house is right by a path that the neighbourhood kids go by on their way to school and back. I couldn’t leave a squished bunny body there for the kids to see, I didn’t want to be known as the Bunny Killer house. I started looking around for a way to dispose of the body. I thought about getting a recycling bin from the side of the house to put it in but the snow was so high I couldn’t get around. As a matter of fact, as I looked around all I could see was snow. Then I spotted it. Our shovel had been left leaning against the wall by our front door. I went over, I grabbed the shovel and scrapped the bunny off the floor and onto the shovel. Then I thought “Now what?. I have the bunny on the shovel but what do I do with it”. I had a bright idea. I dug a hole in the snow, dropped the bunny in and covered it with more snow. I finally exhaled and thought Mr Libertydee could figure out what to do with it that evening but for now the neighbourhood would never now what had happened.
I proudly put the shovel back, feeling pretty good that I had been able to handle the situation on my own and that I had managed to protect my baby girl from the terrible truth that is life and death. Or so I thought. I am not sure what I was thinking, as you may have already figured out on your own, my car has windows and so when I entered the car and sat down. My baby girl’s voice came from the back “Mommy? Why were you shoveling the bunny?”
One thought on “Bye Bye Bunny”
ahahahahahahhaah – after all of that work to shield her, then you forgot in the angst of the fear of being the “bunny killer” house. I’m dying over here! Okay, now I totally have to go pee I’m laughing so hard!!